I normally give a lecture about Memorial Day on my Facebook feed. It's not the unofficial kick off to summer. It's not the start of BBQ season. It's not Veteran's Day or Armed Forces' Day. It's a very specific day of remembrance. It's for those that did not make it. The whole all gave some and some gave all moment.
I've gotten so much push back from people when I correct them, or when Brent corrects them, for thanking him for his service on Memorial Day. First off, he really doesn't like it when people thank him for his service at any time, but on Memorial Day especially. Memorial Day is for those that did not live. Stolen valor is a giant taboo in the service and there is no worse stolen valor than to take away the focus on Memorial Day.
But people are offended when they are corrected. As if "I was trying to be nice" means it's okay.
It's not.
And I do understand that you were trying to be nice, but take the correction.
This year Memorial Day is also in our window of we don't know. We don't know when Brent's mother actually died. Her official date is May 29. But it could have been today, or tomorrow. The last time anyone saw her was early on the 27th. She was going to go to bed and try and recover. She stopped answering texts the evening of the 27th but we don't know if she was just asleep or if she was already gone by then. Her friend didn't break into the house and find her until the 29th after she didn't respond to messages the 27, 28 and 29. And after the police went to the wrong house for the check.
So we are in the we don't know period. Her official date of death is the 29th, but we are pretty sure that that is not it. It seems more likely that it was the 27th or 28th.
Forget what you know from watching police procedurals, there was no coroner looking at her body before they loaded it up and saying, well clearly she died on this date at this time. It's all estimates. And with the backlog of deaths at the morgue we were lucky to get a death certificate within a few weeks. If we had wanted a full autopsy it would have been months before they could get to her.
Because so many people were dying right then.
Which is why the "Are you better off now than you were four years ago?" bullshit that Trump's lackies are trying is so infuriating. Four years ago we had refrigerator trucks lined up outside morgues while he talked about injecting bleach. Yes, we are clearly better off now than we were then.
But today is Memorial Day. A moment to remember Jack, to remember Ann and to be grateful for all of the people who are being remembered by their friends and family.
And to wish, as always, that the wars would stop. That we would stop sending our children to die for lines on maps. For resources that if the world decided to share there is enough for everyone to share. That we would stop dropping bombs on children and justifying it by saying it's either their children or ours. We don't have to kill each other. It's a choice we make. And we continue to make the wrong choice.
Remember that today.
And every day.
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