For at least a decade I have been in search of the perfect red lipstick. And I've found it. More than once. Quite a few more times in fact. And then I lost it. And I started the search over.
Instead of true red, now I need a brick red. More brown in it, less blue.
But never orange red. That has never been the perfect red.
And never too pink. Like a dusty rose color is okay, I mean I know that's not red, but nice for a change up, but not bright pink. And not brown. Even though I want a brick red I don't want a brown lipstick.
But I still ended up with a lot of those other colors.
Today I did a big sort and got rid of the reds that used to be perfect but now fight with my hair. The reds that were never quite perfect but I thought if I layered them with some tinted glosses they worked okay. The browns and pinks that came as gifts with purchase that I just couldn't bear to toss right away, I mean, they are perfectly good lipsticks, creams, glosses, afterall.
And that was really it. I had a drawer full of maybes but not reallys.
And not just with lip colors. With eyeshadows and creams. With foundations and cover ups. Which I never wear foundation or cover ups. I try every once in awhile but I hate the feeling of a cream on my face. Like it never stops just feeling like a mask. I have a tinted powder that I love and I brush that on to even things out, when I remember, and a CC cream for the sunscreen, and that's that. But I still had 3 different foundations or tinted face creams and two different cover ups.
I had big eye shadow palettes that I clearly bought for one color because that color was gone and the other 12 were barely touched. But I still had them. Because the other colors were fine and I was sure I'd use them sometime. I mean not today, because today I'm going to use the same stick I've been using for ever and call it good enough...but someday.
And the variety of mascaras. Sephora sends samples all the time. I had probably 4 different small mascaras from various brands. For years all I ever wore was Great Lash from Maybelline. Now recently I've started using Thrive's tubing mascara. It's amazing stuff. Cleans up like a dream and doesn't melt down my face during the day. But I still had a variety of other brands "to try someday" that wasn't going to happen. I mean just trying the Thrive took me forever. Which as well as that turned out I probably should try the other brands they might be great as well...just not today. Today I'll wear the one I know I love. Later I'll try something new.
And I'm totally going to use that black thin point eyeliner. I mean I need that if I'm ever going to perfect a cat's eye. Which I am totally going to be able to do, even though I have never been able to do it, and I don't think my eyesight or coordination is going to improve after my mid fifties, but you know, totally could happen.
These are the things I've been telling myself in one way or the other for ages. Today I sorted and tossed instead. I still have quite the collection of red lipsticks, all shades that don't fight with my hair, and a few dusty roses. I have three eyeshadow mini palettes and a few cream sticks. I have the powder I wear most often and I did keep one tinted CC cream for days when I want sunscreen, a little coverage and my face feels dry. That does happen. Rarely, but it does.
Some of what I got rid of took two bites at the apple to do. Either because I really love the brand, or because I know how expensive it was. (Full disclosure, I'm pretty frugal so "so expensive" can be very relative) But I wasn't using them so what they originally cost, or the love of the brand, or even how good it looked when my hair was short and little different shade didn't matter. All it was doing was taking up space and getting old and drying out anyway. But they first got the color test, oh this doesn't work, but instead of straight into the trash they went to a side pile. That kept getting bigger and bigger. Which made me feel really guilty about how much I was getting rid of so it almost all got put back in the holders and put away.
Two bites at the apple.
Off to the "I don't think this works pile" then deep breath, into the trash with the ever growing stack of makeup removing wipes that were colored with so many shades of red it looked like I was bleeding out...
So now what I have in my makeup drawer is a smaller collection of things that I know work for me right now. I still have things I will use more than others, but nothing in there that I won't use at all. And I also know that the collection will start to grow again. Collecting colors that looked good online but didn't quite work out at home. Eye shadows that are trying to replace the Bare Minerals grays that were PERFECT but discontinued. All of it to feed the glamour girl that lives somewhere inside my head but never quite makes it out to my face. Because who has time for that? I mean clearly people do, because you see them out in the world, but who has a way to convince me to make time for that?
Dust of powder, swipe of mascara, the perfect red lipstick.
And a dream of someday...
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