Not Healed...

Ever think you are over something and then discover how far you are from being over it? 

A few days ago a friend of mine was tagged in a photo and post from a friend of theirs. I read the post, as one does and then I hid the post, hid the person, and walked away from my phone to keep myself from going in and posting something nasty to her. 

I'm not going to share her name, but I am going to share the section that made me so mad. Because it was not just an I could see it because my friend was tagged, but a public post, and I'm not sure who she is but she has a blue check so it means she has enough followers to actually be of some sort of influence. 

Ready?

"If you quit working, made patients wear masks, isolated people, or got a shot, I don’t want to give you one ounce of my money, my respect, or my energy."

The amount of entitlement, arrogance and ignorance crammed into such a small space is breathtaking. 

And how raw those 2020 wounds still are in me was a bit shocking. 

With her full chest she boldly declared that not only does she not give a shit about anyone else's health but she's not going to work with you if you did. She's basically saying how fucking dare you as a medical professional put your patients best interests at the forefront. How fucking dare you follow the local laws and regulations to keep your practice safe. How fucking dare you take care of yourself by getting vaccinated. 

(which I'm pretty sure the person she was posing with did get the vaccination but I won't rat her out if she wants to keep that secret)

Over a million people in the US alone died from Covid. Friends and family members of mine did. But I'd like to think I'd be considerate of others even if we hadn't lost people. 

And it's that combination, the personal loss and the belief that I would have been considerate anyway, that combines to make me almost as angry now, four years on, as I was during this time in 2020 when someone would say bullshit like that. 

She doesn't want to give you her respect if you took care of those around you instead of acting like a spoiled, selfish, entitled, arrogant, idiot. 

Oh fuck her. And fuck anyone who still believes all of that.

Over a million deaths in the US alone. Numerous long haulers who are still dealing with lung issues. The virus itself is still out there mutating and infecting, and reinfecting people. And some of them will die. And some of them will get long Covid.

But go on ahead, don't respect anyone who doesn't buy into your version of fuck you, I'm fine. I mean, I certainly don't respect you so I guess it's fair.

Still raw.

Still not healed.
Still angry.