It Kicks!

I graduated in 1986. It seemed like on every notebook, shoe, note passed, yearbook post someone would write '86 Kicks! 

I've had it stuck in my head for a week thinking about hashtags. I skipped last year because I couldn't settle on which worked #55StillAlive (slightly low bar) or #55StillIStrive (seemed a little much) so I went with no hashtag. I also decided that I wasn't going to do any goals for the next year. 

So that was a bust all the way around...

Fifty five was a challenge of a year. Lots of little and not so little health things. But I'm starting to worry that that is the way it's going to be now. The warranty clearly expired somewhere in my early 50s. In fact last night in the middle of the night I need to roll over and stretch, my back was starting to hurt, my hands were clawed up and my fingers were aching and I thought, I can never tell if I've got an injury or if I'm just old and can't stay in one place for long *pause... internal laugh* Happy birthday to me. For the record it was just middle of the night need to stretch, no new injuries! 

It was also a good year for some self discovery. Learned that I have ADD and I've been compensating for it my whole life without ever getting a diagnosis. It didn't really change anything, but it made me feel better to know that I was right, my brain just works differently. And it made me feel like a genius that I had figured out all of the workarounds that they would have recommended to me. I always like to feel smart. 

I also figured out that no goals is a no go for me. I need those things to have ahead of me to keep me focused. Even on things that I like to do. That's tied to the ADD part of my head. I need those gold stars, it's medicinal...

Anyway...now I'm 56. And apparently it kicks. Though Brent did wish me a happy birthday this morning by saying it's Fifty Sexty which was husband level pro for sure. 

What do I want from the coming year?

I want to be healthy. I want to be happy. I want to stay centered and calm during the coming political storm. I want my house to feel comfortable. I want my days to seem focused. I want my relationships with my husband and my child to continue to be solid. 

So what am I going to do to make those things happen? 

Just keep doing what I'm doing. 

Which, I know, sounds like a cop out but it's what I've got. 

I'll keep working out, watching what I'm eating, keeping an eye out for weird health bumps. I'll keep writing and reading and tending to the house. I'll keep connecting with my daughter either over the phone or in person. I'll keep trying my best to be a good partner to my husband. And I'll walk away from things that aren't serving me. Be they relationships that have run their course, news sources that have lost their way, social media that is too much, books that aren't entertaining or enlightening in some way. Habits that are not benefiting me. 

Just more of the same. And for some of it I'll attach numbers to them and trick myself into thinking I've got a stronger reason to do it than just cause I want to. You know, medicinal gold stars. 

And I think that's it. I'll write a little bit more about the health stuff later this week as a stand alone blog. 

But for now

#56Kicks
#FiftySexty
#GetYourKicksImNow56
#56ThatsOneMoreThan55
#56InTheMix
#56teenInMyHead