The Notebook...

Or maybe I should have titled this THE notebook.

Every writer I know has a soft spot for notebooks. I have, right now, at this very moment six different, wait no, seven different notebooks going. And that's not including the binders I use to store printed versions of my blog because I want a physical copy someplace I can search when I'm looking for something I've written before.

I've got two spiral bound lined paper notebooks for temporary quick notes and lists. I've got one moleskine style but hard covered notebook for story notes and goal setting year to year. I've got one moleskine style but has unprinted calendar pages that I was going to use this year instead of a calendar but then realized I really want an actual month and weekly preprinted calendar with room for notes as well, so now I use both. And then two notes programs on my phone. One for lists and one for lists, links and notes. 

And even with that many notebooks I am always half searching for a new one. 

I wrote about getting rid of my Ravenclaw notebook when I finally just ditched all HP stuff because Rowling got too toxic for me to have anything associated with her around. It was the hardest thing to let go. One, because it was a gift and it was such a great gift. Two because it was a great notebook. Fancy but not so fancy you were scared the pages were going to disintegrate when you wrote on them. (Onion Skin pages look so pretty but are so not practical) And three because I had some great ideas started in that notebook. They turned into stories or blogs or goals but they got their start on those pages. I took some comfort in reading over them and knowing that no matter how it feels on that day on another day I made good art. 

When I was younger, before smartphones and apps and even computers that were more than just word processors, I always had a notebook stashed in my purse and in the glove compartment of the car and on my desk at work. I wasn't writing at the time but just incase I felt the need to take a note on something I wanted to make sure I had a notebook. I tended to use steno notepads. The spiral is along the top so no worries about trying to warp my hand and wrist to keep it out of the way. I was really particular about which kind as well. When we would get someone new ordering office supplies I'd have to give them the wrapper from my last pack. I want these. Not the ones that are like them but not them. I want these. I will make you take them back if they are the wrong ones. Don't care what's on sale. Don't care what you like or someone else likes. These are the notebooks I use. Order these. 

Even not writing I needed the perfect notebook. 

The other thing that happens with most writers I know is if we find a notebook that we think might actually be the perfect notebook, the cover is perfect, the pages are the exact right weight, the line spacing is perfect, the color is exquisite, this is THE notebook, well we have a hard time writing in it. I know! I mean that's the whole point of finding THE notebook. It is going to be the magical book that unlocks all of our creative genius and we are going to make the most wonderful art because of THIS notebook.

But...

What if we write something lame in it? What if we take this perfect notebook and ruin it with our ideas? Our sketches? Our outlines? What if it becomes a beautiful piece of promise filled with shit? What then?

I mean, then, obviously, it wasn't THE notebook, it was a pretender and we need to keep looking. 

Couldn't be us, that would be crazy. 

I've stopped hoarding blank notebooks. Finally. A few years ago I pulled all of my stashed supplies out and started working my way through them. They became notebooks full of notes. And when I reached the last page I would flip through and decide if they were done. Had I expounded on all of the ideas? Had I used all of the information I'd stored? Did anything need followed up on? And if there was unfinished business I would copy those ideas into the next notebook on the pile and start again. I didn't keep all of the filled notebooks. Though I know a lot of people who do. I only keep the notebook as long as there is room for new things to be written in them.

And now I'm at the point where if the notebook I'm using fills up I have to find a new notebook to replace it. 

Which means I get to keep hunting for the perfect notebook. 

I swear it's out there someplace. And when I find it? Watch out world...