Thursday, October 12, 2023

Help Yourself #10...

This month was Bittersweet: How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole by Susan Cain. I really enjoyed her book Quiet:The Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking. I would say it was probably close to my favorite book I read that year. So I went into this with really high hopes. And...

Did I mention how much I loved Quiet

The set up for this one was really good. It was all about people who feel things fairly deeply and how that's actually a good thing, even though American society tends to frown on it. We are the suck it up, sunshine, country. And there were nuggets in there that were really good. About tying that bittersweet feeling to creativity. About generational hurt and how we pass things along to our kids and even our grandkids, not by socialization but actually in our genetic code, which fascinates me so I'm glad she touched on it. How you can be a really happy person and also have a touch of melancholy. 

But...

It felt like she had an idea for a book, and then not enough to really fill a book. A lot of padding and fluff and some meandering. 

She also got fairly woo woo for a bit. And for someone who kept emphasizing that she's agnostic that was weird and to call back to another blog; CLANG.

So I recommend Quiet for sure but this one was a slog. Some really good things in there at times but a whole lot of nonsense and padding as well. I guess it really was bittersweet...

What would I have gotten out of it in my 20s? Well, maybe more than I got out of it now. I mean, the bittersweet personality has always been there. The acceptance that life is impermanent and death is part of living has always been there as well. But I was more woo woo in my 20s so that part wouldn't have bugged me so much. I might have even looked up the gurus she talked about seen if they had something to offer me. 

Now, here is a funny part that 20s me would have thought was great but made 50s me roll her eyes as well. When I got the book I saw on the cover that it was an Oprah pick. I would have LOVED that in my 20s, would have felt that was a gold star approval if ever there was one. But 50s me knows that as often as she promotes someone or something good she also promotes people like Dr. Oz and Dr. Phil and was a big goop! supporter and there was Optifast and...well... 

So this one wasn't as big of a miss as a few of them have been but it wasn't the slam dunk I was hoping it would be. 

Also, funny side note, the biography I read this month was from Maria Bamford Sure, I'll Join Your Cult:A Memoir of Mental Illness and the Quest to Belong Anywhere. She talks about all of the 12 step groups she has been a part of and all of the self help books she's read and talked about how they are all really similar to cults if you stop and look at them. Just made me laugh considering how many of them I've been reading this year. And how many cult biographies as well. 

So two more to go, though I think one of them will be a two in one bio/self help I was thinking I'd read it in November but Brent pointed out that December would be a good month to free up some time so maybe then instead. Either way I need to find one more self help book for the year. Fingers crossed it turns out to be a good one. 


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