"Well it was the cat's fault. Wait, is that okay? To blame a cat? I mean it's not like he did it on purpose or anything and really he didn't do anything except get chased by the dog. Oh! Maybe it was the dog's fault?
I mean the cat never liked going in that room. Ever. Would roam all around the house but even walked wide around the doorway to that room. Like sort of hugged the opposite wall in the hallway. Didn't hiss or carry on, but just didn't ever go in or near to it at all.
Except when the dog chased him in there.
So is it the cat's fault? Or is it the dog's fault?
I could say it was my fault, I guess, but I didn't know. And if you don't know how can you be blamed?
I know they say that ignorance is no defense but that's just dumb. Of course it's a defense. If I don't know something is wrong how in the world am I supposed to realize I'm doing something wrong? Right? But I did sort of know something was wrong. I mean the whole thing with the cat. But I didn't really know what it was, because how could I?
So anyway, not the dog's fault, not the cat's fault, not my fault. Just one of those weird things that happens sometimes. The dog chases the cat into a room he never likes to go. The cat freezes inside the room and just starts yowling like crazy but doesn't leave the room. I get frustrated and yell, 'You don't have to stay in there you know! You can come out whenever you'd like!'
And that released the ghost that was trapped in the room and now he's wandering around the whole house just being a huge pain the ass. The dog and the cat have had to go stay with my mother. I can't keep fresh milk in the fridge, it spoils almost as soon as I get it in the house. I haven't had a good night's sleep in weeks. He keeps making the walls drip blood and yeah... it's a lot"
"Okay, well, let's not put all of that in the listing. We will just say 'Older home with a lot of character' and how about if anyone asks you are just looking for a change in scenery?"
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