Sunday, January 26, 2014

Looks like I missed again...

"Oh you missed it!"
"Look, there! No, there, dang it, you missed it."

There was a lot of that yesterday at Comic Con. There was so much going on all of the time that Brent and I spent a good deal of it telling each other to look at something and the other person missing it because there was so much else to look at. I figured out early if I stopped to take a picture of someone in costume I would miss three others walking by. So I pretty much just stopped taking pictures unless we were stopped someplace. I didn't want to miss anything.

Which then got me thinking and well...blog!

“We must be willing to let go of the life we planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us.” -Joseph Campbell

You all know that's one of my favorite quotes. We spend so much time trying to make things the way we want them that we miss what is happening.

Brent and I were talking about high school the other night. Specifically about people we knew back then. We are lucky that because of Facebook we've been able to reconnect with a few friends from school. And there are a few that we weren't super close with back then, peripheral friends, but we find we really dig now. Looking back it's easy to see we should have been closer back then, lots in common, similar world views, so on. But he was quiet (that hasn't changed) and I was guarded (that has) so we missed it. Now we are getting a chance to fix it, but that doesn't always happen. If I could go back in time and talk to my teenage self I would try to get her to understand that she was missing it. By keeping so tightly wound she was missing out on all of the opportunities that were there, grades, scholarships, friendships. But I can't. I missed it.

Over the years I've gotten better and better about not missing it. About realizing when I am focused too much on the "what I wants" instead of the "what is." I preach the gospel of let it go. Even if I'm a lousy disciple sometimes. But I try.

I told you about Dana and the lyrics the other day, today I remembered another one I love. "So often times it happens that we live our lives in chains And we never even know we have the key" -The Eagles.

How many times do we miss out on things because we are tied to an idea? Because we aren't paying attention? Or because we just so badly want it to go another way? And all along we are the ones in charge. We can fix it. You think you are chained to the way life is going but you have the key in your hand, fix it. Change it. Don't miss it. You can't always make life go the way you think you want it to, but you can always change your view.

Don't spend so much time focused on what you think you want, a romantic connection, a different job, a better house, a thinner body, that you miss what you have in front of you; good friends, an opportunity for a promotion, an incredible investment in a neighborhood that's about to take off, a strong healthy body. Don't look back in five or ten years and realize you missed it.

Don't continually play catch up with your life. "Oh if I had done this differently everything would be better!" And so we try and do that same thing now. But it doesn't work anymore. Because now is different than then. What you thought you wanted, or even had a chance at having isn't there any more. You are different than you were back then. So it might not fit anymore. Don't spend so much time trying to make up for yesterday that you miss today. Let it go. Move on. Don't miss it again. Because that's the real bitch in the situation. You can miss it again. Sure the it changes but the missing it doesn't.

Today. That's what you have. Make it work. What is happening right now. Let go of the expectations, of the what you think you should have, and look at what you do have. What is happening. And work with that. Make it the best. Because when tomorrow comes you don't want to look back and realize that you missed it.

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