Ritual...

I love rituals.

When Christopher is home we have a bedtime ritual. Still. At 50 and 26. It's a call and response series. I have no idea when it started, probably sometime after bedtime stories ended. But when he is home we will do it. And I love it.

I love that connective tissue that holds us now to us then. That keeps that something special mother/son feeling going. Because let's face it, he doesn't need me to mother him anymore. He's taking care of himself on a daily basis. When I chime in (and I do still chime in) it's not only not necessary I would guess it's not wanted most of the time. It's not going to stop me, I'm still his mother, but I do understand that it's not going to really make a difference in what he chooses or doesn't choose to do.

We also have holiday rituals. Traditions. They are odd ones, we always watch Christmas Vacation first and watch Scrooged on Christmas Eve after going to a movie out. There are other things we do, but those shift and change. The movies stay the same. At least for now. They might change at some point as well. But for now? I like them. I like that we can watch Christmas Vacation with half an eye and still know exactly where in the story we are and what the next lines are. It enhances our holiday spirit.

And as much as I am not a rule follower in my day to day existence I am ritualistic. I have seen it as I've been reading and sorting all of my blogs. I like goals, so I set them yearly. I've shifted them from my birthday to the traditional New Year, but that was just because it was easier to find things I needed. But I like to set goals. The goal setting is a ritual.

The things I set goals around are ritualistic as well. Reading and writing are almost always on the list. Picture of the Day as well for the past few years. And those things being on the list are part of the ritual but performing them is as well. Especially Picture of the Day. It's a whole deal. Seeing the prompt at the beginning of the month as I scan the list, then again when I look the day before. Thinking about my day and what might fight. Or what I could make fit. Or best option, what I can make fit in a funny way. It's all part of the ritual.

Which I'm pretty sure I'm dropping in 2019. But then again I always think about dropping it around November of the previous year. Maybe that's part of the ritual as well? But this year I think I will actually drop it and just go back to posting pictures when I choose. Because I'm not getting the enjoyment out of it that I used to.

That's where all of my rituals stem from and where they get pruned if they don't measure up. Does this thing bring me joy? Am I having fun with this? And if I'm not having fun with it  but need to do it anyway what do I need to change to make it fun? Going to the gym is never going to fun for me. But it's a ritual in and of itself. To make it stick I made it non negotiable. I go to the gym. It's what I do. It's part of who I am. The fun part for me comes in seeing how much weight I lift each week. It's a not insignificant number. I like it. Make the ritual fun or get rid of it. And for the gym getting rid of it wasn't a healthy option so...

I get push back from people here and there that I live in a rut. That I should do more things that are different. Leave my rituals behind. And when they do that I sometimes think about it a little. Then normally I decide that the constant changers are people who aren't happy with their lives. That are searching for something better. I am happy with where I am. I am happy with who I am with. I enjoy my life. I enjoy my rituals. My goals make me happy. I like to read, I like to write, I like to travel, I like to go to the movies, I like to spend time with my husband, I like to spend time with our son, I like to do the call and response at night when we go to bed.

What rituals do you do?
And do they still bring you joy?

Goal setting for 2019 in a month. Time to start thinking about them.