Today is the one week mark from the Boston Marathon bombings. I don't need to tell you that because the news and your Facebook feed and the radio and the newspapers will all talk about it. A lot. But in just about an hour and a half there will be a moment of silence observed to mark the time of the first explosion. The bombing itself is one of those events that will mark people that were there or connected in some way like 9/11 did for most all of us. Where were you? What do you remember? What was happening? But for me the added layer of what happened next makes me incredibly grateful that there was no Facebook/Twitter/constant barrage of crazy when the Twin Towers were hit. Because let me tell you, some of you are crazy. And your friends are even worse.
Generally when something like this happens I am one of the first to turn off my TV. I don't want to watch over and over as the horrific thing happens. I did it during 9/11. We turned off the TV and didn't go back until they were through showing the Towers falling on constant loop. I did it during Sandy Hook. How many times do you need to see children and teachers being evacuated knowing there were 26 that wouldn't be coming out to get it? I did it during this as well. I just can't see the point in watching it over and over again. And the "news" doesn't help. In the rush to be first they are throwing out every half baked idea and rumor and either spinning up the fear or spreading completely false information.
I also have to admit though that this one was harder for me than usual. Yes, 9/11 was shocking to my soul, but I was in Colorado, not New York so even though it was here in the States the strongest impact was muted for me. Talking to friends of mine who live and work in New York, their experience was completely off the charts compared to mine. Sandy Hook was horrific. These were children. The ones we all should be sworn to protect. But my child was safe. And I know that makes me sound horrible but it's true. There is a part of each of us that counts our loved ones after a tragedy and if they are all there then we feel better. Sad for other people, but with that touch of relief that it wasn't ours. But I kept tearing up when I would hear more information about Boston. Well in to the next day, and the next. And it took me awhile to figure it out.
Which then made me feel stupid for being slow. Because the answer was simple once I acknowledged the question. It's because when I did my loved ones head count after the bombing the first place I started counting was Boston. I have friends that live and work in the area, it's a state holiday though so most of them were home safe and sound. But I also had friends that were there for the marathon weekend. Shorter runs, museum visits, hanging out with other friends of theirs that were running and the marathon itself. Now thanks to Facebook I knew that Chad had finished his run around an hour before the first explosion. He's fast and he's horrible about taking the time to cool down and stretch out (which I guess I can't nag him about anymore) so I was pretty confident that they were out of the area. But my first reaction was to tag them in a status and hope for a quick note letting me know they were okay. Raquel, knowing that everyone was probably freaking out, updated her status right about that time and let us all know they were fine. So I did my one, two, three count and that should have been the end of it right?
But it wasn't. Every time they showed the picture of that smiling 8 year old boy who died waiting to cheer on his dad....well all I could do was selfishly thank the universe that it wasn't a picture of a smiling 9 year old boy. Which is awful right? But human. We always start with our circle and work out. My circle was safe, but I had to admit that they had been too close for comfort. And I knew it wasn't over for them, lock down in the hotel, press conferences a few floors down, the local news waiting at the airport to try and ambush anyone flying in from Boston to get the Northwest Connection. And the fact that they were going to be constantly pinged with "tell me what it was like" requests from all of us. Hell, I tell stories and this is a big story so someday I will sit and listen as well. When they are ready to tell it all. If that happens. Which it might not.
Because see, their circle? It's bigger than mine. It includes the families and the racers that were in the line of the explosions. That were still there. They are all connected by this drive to run far, to push themselves, to support those that do it as well. Runners all have something in common and those that run marathons bond over odd things like bathroom issues and chafed nipples that most of us think are well...weird. Knowing how much this particular event effected me, safe at home in Portland worried about my three out there, I know that it was so much worse for them. The thank goodness and what if games. So if they never ever want to talk about it again, that's okay too. Because they were there, they lived it. They own that story.
And you don't. So here is where my, thank goodness full of love and gratitude post ends and the next portion starts...
On Friday when the final manhunt started I had to shut off not only the TV but Facebook. Because of the nonsense that went up. I just want to say a few things now that I've calmed down enough not to call you all names while I do it. And I understand that this is my blog and my opinion just like the things you all posted were your opinions so disagreeing is fine. But here we go...
To those that posted the meme about blaming the bomber for this incident but we blame guns for mass shootings:
1. Quick name three bombings like this one in the United States in the past let's say 10 years. No Google, not tangential, not unsuccessful, three like this...GO! Now name three mass shootings. Too easy? Narrow it down to three in the past two years. And what were the names of the gunmen? Easy right? Tell me again how we don't blame the shooters in gun violence.
2. On that note, to those that started making posts about how we should regulate pressure cookers. See the question above about the number of bombs. And do you know how to build one? I don't. I could probably find it online and give it a try, though the margin of error would be pretty great, one would think. I have shot a gun. And the mechanics on it aren't that tough to figure out. Oh and let's not forget that the point of a pressure cooker is to cook dinner so there is that, you know, main use for it. Nice try though.
3. In fact to anyone who decided that Monday was the time to try and tie your gun issues (either way) in to this tragedy that had NOTHING to do with guns I say, well, and trust me this is calmer than I was...With all due respect, fuck you.
To those that decided that this was a "false flag" from our government to either, A. Distract us from whatever your pet pay attention to this item is or B. Prepare us all to be under martial law:
1. Let me help you pack. Seriously. If you live here and you honestly believe that your government is like this you should move. Find someplace else to go. Take all of your friends who believe the same thing and go. Find an island someplace where you can start your own commune and live happily ever after.
2. Yes, you think I'm a sheep for thinking you are paranoid. I get that. I also get that the images from Friday were intense. And I'm not sure if they were necessary. But that's because I wasn't there. I wasn't in the middle of it, and I know how it ended. It's so much easier to go back and see how things went when well...you know how they went. So forgive me for thinking it must be a terrifying life you live thinking that the government is out to get you.
For those that posted about the US needing perspective because bombings happen all the time in other places and we should just....
We should just what? Be okay with it? Should we be okay with it anywhere? Do you think that human compassion is limited? And because we mourn our dead yours don't matter? Or because you have more dead ours don't? We mourn the three dead and the hundreds wounded in Boston partly because of the fact that it was unexpected. Because we aren't in the middle of a war zone (we have had many Americans injured by IEDs over the past decade) it was in the middle of a race. So trying to make a point about our lack of compassion and perspective makes you look like an ass. No offense...
For those that were trying their hardest to assign blame to your pet hated group before we knew anything. Oh it must have been the Tea Party! It must have been the Saudi kid! It must have been whoever I want it to have been to fit my world view.
Shut up. Just shut up. The next time something like this happens just shut up. Wait and see. Get the facts, the real ones, not the circle jerk you and your friends are participating in with half fueled rumors and "sources saying" but the ones that take awhile to actually be known in a situation like this one. I know we all want instant answers to our questions and we have gotten pretty used to being able to find out pretty much everything at the touch of a button, but during something like this getting the facts takes time. Instead of filling the void with bullshit just be patient.
Now I'm sure I've offended a few of you out there. Maybe more than a few. And right now I'm okay with that. Because I will tell you one thing that holds true from last week for me. I am grateful. Deeply and solidly grateful. Because this picture was taken April 17th, two days after the bombings.
And I don't need any other perspective right now than that....
Love you!!
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