*whispers* (5/22/09)

Have you ever heard the phrase "Don't call the devil by his name?" It basically means if you say something bad out loud you will bring it to you. My parents are of the generation that took this to heart and would *whisper* any words they felt were scary. Words around death or divorce were always *whispered*. Led to one of the funniest misunderstandings of my life. Now, for those of you reading this that know me, you know I laugh at inappropriate things, for those of you that don't know me as well this is your warning.

There was a prominent business family in the town I grew up in. They owned restaurants and car dealerships and a few other businesses. Well the patriarch of this family was also a bit of a dog. And he was fairly public about it. When I was maybe 11 years old he died. He was at his girlfriend's apartment and there was a gas leak. My parents and other adults were all a buzz about this and would discuss it when they thought the kids weren't in hearing distance. Well, let me tell you, there is nothing that will bring about kids like discussing something you don't want them to hear! But the conversation we all heard went like this:

"Did you hear about JG?"
"I did! Did you hear he was at his *girlfriend's* apartment when it happened?"
"Yes, I did. I can't believe he was *asphyxiated* SG must be so angry!"

Fast forward to my teen years sitting in class one day studying biology. Mrs. Parks asks the class if we know the word for what happens when the body is denied oxygen. A lot of people guess suffocation, but the word she is looking for is asphyxiation. I laughed out loud.

"Ms. Clifton, do you want to share with the class why asphyxiation would be humorous to you?"
and I debated for a moment and then thought, well she asked...
"Well, do you remember JG? He was asphyxiated at his girlfriend's apartment. All this time I thought it was a sexual position and he died trying it!"

Really funny thing is I ended up working for his sons years later and every once in awhile would still get inappropriate giggles thinking that for years I thought asphyxiation had something to do with sex!