The summer she turned 18 she visited the aunts by herself again. Her parents had not divorced two summers ago as she had thought they would but had spent time "rediscovering themselves" and part of their new "relationship reality" was time by themselves to reconnect.
Aunt Bets thought it was ridiculous. "Rediscover themselves? Where did they think they had gone?"
Stacy didn't mind at all. It had given her more time on her own as they scheduled date nights and couples only weekends. She felt like it was preparing her for her time in college. She was, afterall, almost an adult now herself.
It was decided that this summer she would spend a few weeks with the aunts while her parents took a cruise and then they would join her for a long weekend spent celebrating her 18th birthday. They had asked over and over again if she was sure she wanted to spend it at her aunts' house instead of with friends and she had reassured them that she would celebrate with her friends another time. That on the actual date she wanted to be with Aunt Bets and Aunt Gloria and Aunt Perry. The birthday cake house was the best place to celebrate a birthday. Especially a landmark one.
Stacy spent most of her time that summer lying on the platforms her Aunt Bets had installed a few summers ago. They were much the same as they had been that first summer she built them. Not too large. Nothing fancy. No room framing. She had asked why they hadn't built anything more yet and Aunt Bets had replied that "They are waiting."
"Waiting for what?"
"If I knew I would have built it."
These were the sort of answers that drove her father crazy but made Stacy feel that all was right in the world. Aunt Bets would no sooner build something that wasn't ready to be built than Aunt Gloria would take a cake out of the oven before it was finished baking. Everything had a time and they seemed to know what that time was.
One afternoon Aunt Perry found her lying on the platform staring at the clouds. "Being worried is perfectly normal."
Stacy smiled it was not unusual for her Aunt Perry to start a conversation in the middle. "I'm more excited than worried I think."
"Excitement is just worry with better PR."
Stacy laughed, "Maybe."
"Do you feel like you are ready to go?"
"Yes. I have all of my classes picked out, I've starting chatting with my roomates. Orientation is in a month and freshmen will have a week on campus to settle in and learn where everything is before the rest of the students arrive."
"What are you hoping to learn?"
"Everything."
Now it was Aunt Perry's turn to laugh. "Everything is a pretty tall order."
"That's why I'm excited." Stacy paused "And worried. What if it's not what I am expecting? What if, instead of the classes being interesting they are boring? What if the professors are dull? What if I don't like it? What if I'm not cut out for college?"
"Then you can leave. You should never stay where you don't want to be."
Stacy thought about the option of leaving. That is what her Aunt Bets had done. She hadn't stayed in college when she discovered it didn't suit her. But Stacy couldn't imagine doing the same. She had scholarships that were going to pay for most of her tuition but her parents were still spending a lot on books and room and board to send her. And she was grateful for that. And already feeling the pressure of the expense.
"No matter what you think you owe to someone you never owe them your discomfort." Aunt Perry looked at her. Really looked at her. "No matter who it is."
"That is easier said than done."
Aunt Perry sat down on the edge of the platform and took Stacy's hand in hers. "It might be, but it's important. You are going to be in situations in your life where your inner voice and your manners fight. You need to let your inner voice win. If it helps to imagine that voice as your Aunt Bets' voice so you don't worry so much about good manners that's fine."
Stacy laughed. "Is that what you do?"
"No, I hear Gloria's. Quietly telling me what I already know. And promising me a cookie if I do the right thing. And she always comes through with the cookie."
Stacy laughed again.
But she remembered. And more than once she head her Aunt Bets telling her it was time to leave a situation, that she didn't owe anyone her discomfort no matter what.
When Aunt Bets found out that she had been Stacy's internal voice all through school she just nodded. "Of course I was. I am the best at giving advice after all. Gloria would just offer you a cookie."
Aunt Perry and Stacy had laughed a little louder at that than Bets had been expecting.
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