"She told me I was being really judgmental lately and I was like, I'm not being judgmental, you are just making really bad decisions."
"Yeah, she's..."
"I mean you know she's sleeping with *couldn't quite pick up the boy's name* right? She says they are in love but whatever she's totally sleeping with him. And he's not a good guy. I mean, I'm taking it really slowly with Carl and he is a really good guy."
"Yeah, he is. You and Carl are dating now?"
"Yeah. Sort of. We are going slowly, and I haven't really committed to it yet, but we are totally dating now." (which made me wonder if Carl knew they were dating)
This is where I was trying very hard to turn and look at these two without getting caught looking at them. They were two very young ladies, late teens, I would say, grabbing dinner together and gossiping their asses off. I did almost lose it when the redhead said the line about not being judgmental while totally judging her other friend...
Then after a little more discussion about other friends and who was sleeping with whom their food was ready and they bowed their heads and prayed then ate.
And I almost punched Brent in the shoulder with glee.
This was a snapshot in to my teen years. The seriousness with which they discussed dating. The judgement over who was sleeping with whom. The scandalized nature of it all. All wrapped up with a pretty religious bow.
When Brent and I got married at 18 everyone assumed I was pregnant. Valid assumption really. You don't get married at 18 unless you are knocked up right? And if you want to see a high percentage of "early" babies watch good church weddings. Lots and lots of babies that come at 7-8 months who weigh in at 8 pounds...mmmm... hmmmm....
These two will go in a story at some point in time, the judgement line is perfection. And because I recognize them from my life they will be easy to write for sure.
But on the serious side this is where religion (at least the one I was raised in) fails young women. Dating at 15 and 16 and 17 should be about having fun, not looking for a spouse. But it is about looking for a spouse. You see more young women who are engaged at ages where they really shouldn't even be expected to pick a college major successfully. And they are told not to have sex, though they totally have sex because you know, they are going to marry the guy so they feel it's okay. BUT because they aren't supposed to have sex, abstinence only education you know, they have sex (because they love him and are going to marry him) but don't use birth control (because they aren't supposed to have sex and it's hard to "get carried away" if you pre-plan and buy a condom) so then they do end up married and with a baby when they are still babies themselves and...
Well now you know why the church doesn't fight as hard against divorce (which isn't allowed biblically) as they do gay marriage (which is murky at best). Mmmm...hmmm....
But it was fun to eavesdrop and I appreciate them gossiping out loud (also a no no) so I could enjoy a little flash back to my youth...
And kids out there? Wear a condom. If you are mature enough to have sex, you are mature enough to talk about protection. Wrap it up.
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