Abandonment issues...

So this is under the writing process label because it really is part of the process. Abandonment...

The TBT post I pulled for today was from Practical Magic, a short story that came to me out of a really weird dream. It's fantasy so not my usual thing. But I liked it. I liked it enough to start writing it as a blog series. Then I kind of let it go. Then last year during NaNoWriMo I picked it up again and after a month of diligently working on it I had just over 50,000 words of story.  And right now I have...just over 50,000 words of story.

Pick it up September 2012. Put it down October 2012. Pick it up November 2013. Put it down December 2013. And yesterday was the first time I had read any bit of it since then. I have looked at the files. I have considered the massive amounts of editing that needs done and I have closed the files again.

I'm not saying that there isn't a good story there. I think there still might be. And I'm not saying I won't ever go back to it. I probably will. In fact after reading the post from two years ago I was reminded how much I actually liked Deeds and Cal. And they will probably start sitting in the corner of the "bar" casting small spells to try and get my attention. Or more likely throwing darts right past my head. That's more their style...

Anyway, that's the part of the process that drives people that know me crazy. I start stories. I don't always finish them. I have so many WIP folders and notes and just spaces in my head that it's sort of crazy. This morning our dental hygienist asked Brent if I was still writing children's books. Did you remember I tried that? Sent some to publishers. Heard nothing. File closed. I sort of pouted at him,"Well I think I'm talented!" I was playing around. Mostly. He said that she agreed and had really liked the stories I had shared. Which is always nice to hear.

But that's the other secret. There are a lot of talented people out there. And they are all doing what I did. Write, submit, wait. The ones that make it are either lucky or persistent. I've not been either. I've submitted a few stories to a few publishers but not nearly the volume that I could. And I've heard nothing. Which drives me a little crazy, send me a "not interested" email at least! I have zero urge to self publish. I watch friends who have made that choice and the amount of self promotion they have to do. It's almost constant. Across multiple platforms, in a variety of areas. Constantly reminding people that they have a book, they should buy it, they should tell their friends about it, there will be a signing at these locations, and books will be for sale there...it's overwhelming to even contemplate.

There is a line from Billy Joel's song Scenes from an Italian Restaurant  "Everyone said they were crazy, Brenda you know you're much too lazy. Eddie could never afford to live that kind of life."

Let's just say when I hear it I am glad that Brent isn't Eddie...

Because the really crazy part of all of it? I'm okay with it on a base level. I like sharing my little short stories with you all. I still put together other things in my WIP files and I still think at some point I will publish a book of either short stories or an actual novel. But even if I don't? I've written some pieces I'm actually really proud of. I've shared them with you. I've heard from other people that they liked what I put out there. I've gotten good feedback from people on things to change to become a better writer. And I have reached the point where I call myself a writer without even qualifying it.

Pick it up. Put it down. Pick it up. Put it down. It's almost like exercise when I write it out, and that's good for you right?

Let's go with that....