Tuesday, May 20, 2014

Let's Talk about Sex, Baby....

So today I'm going to promote a friend of a friend's project and ramble a bit about that.

I've talked about Cami before and that it was actually through her that I had my big epiphany moment about homosexuality. And I've shared on Facebook her project Happy Hour with Cameron Stiehl where she is still bringing people together to reach common ground. But what I want to talk about today is another series that I got in to because she shared it. The Sex Talk. The one I'm linking is about bi-phobia.

Okay, so let me back up here. The first one I watched I watched because if you share something that is important to you I am going to watch it, read it, look at it, at least once. Because it's important to you. And if it's important to you then as your friend I should at least see what it is. Now that doesn't mean I will keep looking, reading or watching, but I at least want to know where you are coming from. So I watched one because Cami shared it.

So I watched and then got hooked.

The one today was a topic that I really only know about because of Cami. She's been out for as long as I've known her. And always as bi. She and Brent actually dated in high school. Yes, my husband dated a hot redheaded bi chick in high school. He also dated a cheerleader. Yes, I know and trust me I worked through all of that years ago...ANYWAY...I think because I was having my own realization moments of people are people hit during that time and I was around straight, gay, lesbian, bi and fighting it (not questioning, they knew they were gay they just didn't want to accept it yet because of the stigma, this was the 80s after all, things have changed, thank goodness) I just placed bi on the continuum and moved on. It wasn't until reconnecting with Cami a few years ago that I found out that she faces a nice dose of double discrimination in her life.

She gets it from straight people and homosexual people. Everyone just wants her to choose! And I hear it from others here and there. That they don't believe anyone is bi. That people just say that they are bi because they don't want to fully own the gay label. Or they want to sound edgy. This one time in college...

Which always stuns me. You want me to acknowledge that sexuality isn't a choice except for people who don't have a gender preference? Umm...nope. I really do believe that for some people it's really fixed. You only like one or the other. For some people it's constantly fluid. You just like the person doesn't matter their sex organs. And for some people it is really person specific. They might not identify as bi even though they've been with someone of the same sex. But it was really and truly only that person. They aren't attracted to the same sex as a general rule, but that person for them made it not matter. Same with people who identify as gay but have been with someone of the opposite sex because of that one person.

So anyway, The Sex Talk that I linked at the beginning of this post is about that. And so I thought it was interesting. But I've found most all of their talks interesting. Even when it's a subject that has nothing to do with my world. So why is that?

For one they are funny. And they are smart. And they just seem super cool. You kind of want to be friends and hang out. Or maybe that's just me....anyway...

The other part that I realized is part of why I really like them is BECAUSE they are out of my normal realm. If I was only ever talking to people just like me I would only ever hear things I already know. And how boring would that be? And even when they do address topics that aren't out of my realm (good advice on not using sex as a weapon last month) it's a fresh angle. And good advice.

So my good advice for you today is take some time to check out The Sex Talk  so you too can learn about important things like the two fuck rule. And of course, probably not a good work watch and if the little ones are around maybe a set of head phones. Because...two fuck rule.



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