Saturday, June 16, 2018

Follow Up...

So the blog I posted a few days ago about cleaning people out of your life that needed to go? I followed that up with a Facebook post also talking about it. Then yesterday I ended up cleaning someone else out for falling into that gap. The we don't agree, but it's more than a disagreement, it's a fundamental difference.

He was arguing a point with me that we disagreed on and that's fine. Then he sent me a PM about how liberals can't seem to understand laws and consequences. And as they say, that was that.

So now the tally is at three so far in the past few days that have been cleared away. I would guess there will be others. I'm trying to feel badly about this, but I just can't find it.

We have gotten extremely tribal. Limiting my friends to people that agree with me on most things will only make that worse for me. However...keeping people around who make me disgusted with their world view won't actually help either. It just reinforces the tribalism. If you post a lie about Planned Parenthood instead of just saying you don't believe in abortion that's a problem. If you argue that liberals are stupid or lawless instead of just saying you have a more conservative viewpoint, that's a problem.

We have to figure out how to talk to each other again. But I will not abide by rudeness in the pursuit of that. If you can't make your point without name calling, no matter how passionately you feel, you need to go sit on the time out step. If you can't voice your opinion without adding a lie to try to bolster your point you really don't have a point at all. We don't have to agree. We never have to agree. But I'm neither stupid nor spineless so don't act like I am.

I would like to see the middle come together. I still think there are more of us than there are of them. I would like to reach compromises with people where we might have issues that we will never agree upon but we focus on the points we can agree on and work towards those. I would like to see more discussion and less hectoring. But I will not put up with the other in search of what I want anymore.

I'm done.

I'm tired of fighting.

I'm tired of having to take a deep breath before I check my notifications.

I'm tired of reading the same cut and paste talking points instead of original thought.

We need to figure out how to talk to each other again. I'll be here ready for the conversation.


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